Sunday, April 11, 2010

I'm only one person!

Many of you have probably heard me tell this story before, but I felt to repeat it. God called me into ministry when I was in the 6th grade. I struggled with that call for years. The thoughts of my own inadequacy seemed to plague me. It was as if a beacon of questions to God continued to resound in my spirit, and while I tried to run faster than the questions I began avoiding them. I couldn’t figure out why God had called me and what he was thinking. I don’t know if any of you have ever had moments when you felt as if you were wrestling with God but I sure did. I was getting tired of it. Time after time I would bring an excuse of question up to God and time after time He’d answer me. My excuses were becoming like dominoes and they were falling before me. I kept trying to raise them, but I was loosing my struggle and I knew it. I was now a junior in high school and while I still had plans with eventually perusing ministry, internally my questions raged.

One of the last doubts I had was the “I’m only one person, what difference can I make?” My little Lutheran youth group traveled up to a conference in a metro inter city area. As part of the youth conference we had to do some mission work by cleaning up a local park. It was early in the afternoon, and only two young girls really played in the park. It was littered with trash and broken bottles everywhere. As the girls swung on the swings gabbing away, my mom got to talking to them. The condition of their park was normal. As I knelt before a pile of broken glass, I watched the green tinted glass in the son. I felt the Lord deep on the inside of me say words that have always stayed with me. I’d been murmuring all day about me being only one person. How could I as one person make a difference in the world? But as I stared at that glass I could almost audibly hear the voice of God say, “That piece of glass won’t end up in that child’s knee.” With the next piece of glass I heard the same thing, and the next and the next. That day I stopped struggling with God about me being called into ministry. I’ve wondered the how’s but I stopped wrestling. Later we went to the mall and I purposely purchased a ball hat, and often I’ll wear that hat and remember that one person can make a difference.

Jesus was only one person. His seed sown has born millions of other seeds. He made a difference.

We have to get to the point where we trust God! Jeremiah 1:5 says, “"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." God formed you in the womb. That means He knows the giftings on the inside of you. He knows you better than you know yourself.

You have to stop wrestling with God when He’s calling you to do something. You’re frustrating Him and yourself. You have to get past yourself. It doesn’t matter your past. It doesn’t matter the age. It doesn’t matter the family. It doesn’t matter the education. It doesn’t matter what you look like. It matters who God is on the inside of you, and His plans for you are perfect.

In 1 Samuel 16 God instructs Samuel to go to Jesse’s sons and anoint the future king. That among these sons is the king God has chosen. So Samuel goes. Seven sons pass before him and I’m sure at this point Samuel is questioning if he really heard from God. When Samuel asks Jesse again, they’re like “yea there is one more brother. He’s the baby of the family. Earlier even the Lord warned Samuel don’t look on his outside appearance but trust me. Finally David shows up and Samuel knows this is the one chosen. According to culture, the high honor would go most likely to the oldest. That one would have birthrights. But God didn’t choose the likely one. He chose David.

In the early years I struggled with why God called me, God finally revealed to me it wasn’t that he chose me. He created me for the purpose He had for me. I was created for a purpose. So was David. So were you. You were created for plans and purposes and in your life is destiny. Don’t short change yourself today, just start walking it out. Don’t keep wrestling, just do it. Begin today to walk in your destiny through Christ Jesus, and you’ll be glad you did.

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